It's so embarrassing...


 

This came too soon. With DD, it took a bit, or atleast that’s what I’d like to believe.

This past week, we went to Indonesia on vacation. It was a much anticipated, high-expectations vacation.
The kids had gone 2 months with no holidays apart from the weekends, so they were really looking forward to chilling by the beach, and making the parents participate in all the adventure activities.

DS for one was counting down the days. With a 2 week vacation, the first week was spent with friends – a trip to Universal Studios and a water theme park. This ofcourse was not sufficient. It only took away 2 of the 5 ‘working’ days.

All his friends were traveling, so clearly DS knew his parents were not really interested in his enjoyment, not withstanding that we had to wait for his sister to return from her outdoor expedition through school.

“Fine, son” I said.  I do call him son… it doesn’t really roll of the tongue, but I call him son, so he knows that “beta” means son in Hindi. So he either hears “Fine, son” or “Theek hai, beta.” There isn’t really an equivalent in Tamil that sounds good. “Seri, Kanna” is what I go with. Kanna is sweetheart, or darling. Thankfully he knows all these phrases.

“Fine, son. We’ll make a trip after Dika comes back.” That seemed to calm him.

“I don’t want to go to any trip after coming back. I need to rest.” DD declared. So that led to some back and forth, and we agreed not to book anything for DD, but that we’ll wait for her to come back.

“If Dika doesn’t come, will we not go?” DS started as soon as Dika was out of the house.

“Do you want to go without Dika?” I asked.

“No, but I want to go on a vacation. Why won’t she come?”

“Maybe she will. Or maybe you can convince her.”

“She doesn’t listen to me…” and that went on for a bit.

But contrary to popular belief, DD did want to go on the vacation, and that made the little kid really, really happy.

So off we went.

We took the ferry to Bintan and on the way, I felt all very motherly, and really wanted to hug my baby.

My son seemed all very excited too, jumping between his seat and ours.

I pulled him closer and hugged him on my lap.

“Mamma, please stop. It is embarrassing” He said, and broke my heart into a thousand pieces.

“What?” I asked in disbelief.

“Mamma, I am not a baby. I am a big boy. You can’t make me sit on your lap. It’s embarrassing.”

“What?”

“Maaaa…” he freed himself.

Ady who was witnessing all this added, “Looks like the umbilical chord is finally cut.”

I was pretty devastated. I knew DS was right, he was a big boy now, but I just needed some more time with my baby.

“Embarrassing?” I kept looking at Ady in disbelief, as DS went back to his seat with Dika. “He’s seven.”

“It’s ok” Ady tried to cheer me up. “He’s growing up.”

I was about to react, when DS hurt his elbow jumping from his seat to ours.

“Ow!” he whimpered, looking at me. I didn’t react.

He came back to me, sat on my lap, “Mamma, I hurt myself.”

It was his way of making sure I was ok, ‘cause with everything else that came after it …the rock climbing, the archery, wakeboarding, and with all the falls, he was a ‘brave boy who can take care of himself’.

My little. My heart.  

 

 

 

 

 

 

 


Happy Birthday, Babe!

 


 

It was DD’s B-day yesterday. She’s growing too fast for my comfort. I didn’t plan anything for her birthday; she managed everything herself.

“DD, your brother has a birthday invite for his friend’s birthday on the 24th.” I had mentioned it to her a month ago, to see how she’d respond. If I’m being honest, I wanted her to whine and complain that I would even ask such a question. The answer was that DS wouldn’t go. It was his big sister’s birthday after all!

“Sure,” she said. “I am guessing it’s in the morning or afternoon?”

“Yeah, afternoon.”

“Sure, he should go.”

“What about your birthday?”

“I haven’t planned anything for my birthday yet, and even so, I think I may plan something without a seven-year-old.”

“You’ll have your birthday without us? I have to take him to the party.”

“What about Papa?”

“I don’t know, he may be here, he’s still on the mend, from his ligament tear.”

“Hmm, that should work.”

“What?” I exclaimed.

“Mamma, if I plan anything it’ll likely be a movie and dinner. It’s going to be a musical. I know how you guys hate musicals. I may need Papa to take us to the movie theater because I am thinking of watching ‘Mean Girls,’ and here in Singapore it's 16+. I am not sure how strict they’re going to be. If they are, then Papa might need to be there.”

She was so clear in her thought process. But where’s the emotion? I was wondering to myself.

“We can definitely have dinner together. It doesn’t need to be on 24th; it can also be on 23rd, Saturday, so all of us can have a long night.”

She has thought of everything, yet she says she hasn’t thought of it,  I continued thinking.

Come 23rd… “So, shall we go to an Escape Room?” she asked.

“Yay!” DS screamed.

“Yes!” Ady agreed.

“Sure” I agreed too.

“Let’s go to the Escape Room and to that Thai restaurant that we went to a couple weeks ago. I liked the Pad Thai there.”

“I don’t like Thai,” DS interrupted.

“Too bad, you had your birthday and got what you wanted. Now it’s mine, and I get what I want. Besides, Mamma feeds you at home before we go out, so you should be fine.”

DS began to whine, and I was so grateful to take care of him and convince him that today was “Dika’s Day.”

DD had organized a Mean Girls Birthday Theme in Pink and she decided to host a party at home. It was too much of a risk to go all the way to the theater only to be told they don’t meet the age criteria.

“Mamma, can you buy donuts for us? I’ll get the pizzas from across the street.”

“Happy to help.” And I meant it.

And that was her simple birthday. Her friends arrived, all stylish in pink. The girls had a movie night, donuts, pizzas, and non-stop singing.

I wasn’t stressed in the least, but I missed planning for my baby. “You’re missing being in control,” Ady said, as if on cue.

“I don’t know. I don’t know if it’s the planning or her owning everything that’s making me sad.”

“Not sad. Proud,” he corrected me. “Yeah, proud, but I feel her slipping away.”

“And that’s OK. As long as we’ve prepared her for it.”

“Hmmm…” I sighed.

I missed the princess, fairy birthday parties. I missed the joyful scream on seeing the Frozen cake. I missed her incessant demand for new dresses and tights. I missed the shopping for return gifts…which reminded me…

“DD, make sure….” I tried adding.

“Mamma, relax. I got this.” And she did.  

Happy Birthday, Sweetheart!


Image credit: ABP Cake shop

Of Assets and Libraries







-- Eavesdropped Conversation --



"I am actually an asset, papa" I heard DS tell Ady. 
"No son, you're a liability. We only spend on you, we don't get anything in return."
"But I came from mamma for free. You didn't buy me."
"Well, the doctor did charge to deliver you"
"Dika is a library, but I bring you so much joy."
"Yes you do, and so does Dika. Liability." 
"But I am more of an asset than she is. She just stays in her room."
"Both of you are... Libailities. We pay for everything you do, and you end up wasting everything we feed you."
"You should only give me what I like then" DS reasoned. 
"Yeah, I don't think only cereal is a healthy choice."
"You can't give us stuff we don't like, and then say we waste it."
"Well, that's what you get."
"Then you're making us waste, papa. You're forcing us to not be assets."
"No, we give you healthy food, so you can be healthy. You choose...junk."

The boys emerged from the room, and DS came running to me. 

"Mamma, don't I give you hugs, so many hugs and kisses?" DS was looking for an ally.
"Yes you do, my baby" I said. "You give the best hugs and kisses."
"So I am an asset" DS said. 
"Yes, you are" I agreed. 
"Your hugs and kisses are free. Like my hugs and kisses to you." Ady continued.

"What's happening?" I asked, feigning ignorance.
"Papa's telling me about assets and librarires, and he's calling me a library."
"Liability" I corrected. 
"Yes, Liability."
"Oh you're an asset, my child" I hugged him. "You give me so much happiness."

"See, Papa?" DS teased his dad. 

"Well, you make him eat his veggies now. You're such a liability" Ady dismissed me. 
"Library!" DS corrected him. 


Image Credit: https://easy-peasy.ai/ai-image-generator/images/cute-electronic-accounting-calculator-icon-3d-pop-illustration